![]() ![]() The physician leading the research proposed something that sounded outrageously simple. Then after seven years-and some 70 doctors-I was put into a research program at Cedar-Sinai hospital. I managed to drive up to northern California and volunteer part-time with a church youth group for a couple months. A heart attack? I was barely 30! I used to be in great shape. One test showed that I was at a dangerously high risk of having a stroke or heart attack. This Cliff was the one who spent days at a time in bed. In a flurry of activity, I took them all to Goodwill. The hundreds of CDs I’d collected over the years-Hootie & the Blowfish, Dave Matthews, Creedence Clearwater Revival-were packed in boxes in my closet. I tried to let go of the past, the old me. Why was I still sick? What was I doing wrong? I’d always had a strong faith, but what difference did it make now? Jesus had healed all those people in the Bible. I came to see myself as a bundle of symptoms, a case study for doctors to ponder. My friends were getting married, having babies, getting promotions at work. Maybe anything.įor seven years, I barely lived, sleeping half the day, gaining weight, hoping against hope that some doctor, some new regimen, would bring me the cure I longed for. Nobody could figure out what was wrong with me. I went to doctor after doctor, did test after test, tried different treatments, took all kinds of medication. ![]() I holed up in my old bedroom for month after month, the months turning into years. Had to quit my job, give up my apartment, retreat to my parents’ house. #Made of miracles movieI was in the midst of launching my career, working for one of the movie studios in Los Angeles, hoping to become a producer someday. High fevers, water retention, inflammation, dizziness, nausea, overwhelming fatigue. Back when I was in my mid-twenties, an illness hit me and hit hard. Why would that all suddenly come to an end? ![]()
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